Happy 1st Birthday, our sweet Eli.

My water broke at 1pm. Your brother witnessed this happen on the hospital floor. We had been inpatient at Good Sam since July 8th. You were already causing trouble. Contractions were coming, and coming fast. I was scared. I was not quite sure how this labor would go compared to the labor with your big brother. Boy was it easy! Epidural went smoothe and mama finally got to relax. Somewhat. Daddy had the tablet ready to go, so we could record your birth in case we never got to see you again...we had to prepare for the worst. We just didn't know. You were born at 7:35pm on July 16th, 2013. You weighed 7lbs 10oz and were 21.25 inches long. You took about 15 seconds to cry once you were out, and quickly wisked away to get checked and clean. A slightly blue color, but not as bad as we expected. I wasnt able to see you for what seemed like an eternity. Doctors were everywhere and daddy was able to be by your side the entire time. Once you were clean, I was able to have a moment before you were being taken away to CCHMC. That was the hardest part. You were born and taken away. I held you for the first time, 5 hours after you were born. I spent the first night of your life, away from you. Daddy stayed with you until I was discharged from good sam hospital. CCHMC, is where you would spend the next 5 months of your life...

Happy Birthday, to our sweet Eli.

So scared, so nervous, so excited, so sad, so happy, and so ready. We didn’t know what to expect. What we knew for sure, was that we had a baby we have loved since the day we found out we were expecting again, November 14th 2012, no matter what. We knew you had a serious heart defect. We knew that you would be fighting for your life, from day 1. This day, one year ago. No for sure way of knowing how long this fight would last. Would you be strong enough for surgery? Would you even make it through surgery? Would we hold you right away? Would you ever come home to meet your big brother? Would you walk? Would you talk? Would you celebrate your first birthday? We knew we had to trust in our God, to take care of you, and that’s about all we knew.

One year ago, we didn’t know you. You are so sweet, able to overcome anything thrown your way, so determined. You are such a fighter, and we should have known how much fight you had in you from day one. I should have known from the start, you would not back down from a fight. This fight, for your life, every day.

What a fight you have faced. 3 open heart surgeries, many cardiac caths, multiple intubations, multiple infections, 149 days in CCHMC, appointments, therapists, baby checks, vaccines, teething, helmet gear. Through it all, smiles and giggles, learning to roll. Learning to laugh, clapping, kisses. A smile that can melt your mama’s soul! Such a joy to life, more than we could have ever expected. We could NOT be any more proud of you, our sweet little Eli.

Your fight is far from over. Your new heart remains only so good in your body for so long. Estimated to have another heart transplant in your twenties. Will you want it? Will your current new heart, last that long? Will you be married at this time? Will you have kids? Will you have even gone to college?

But today, on your first birthday, we rejoice in the moment of your life right now. We love that we can worry about you eating your own dirty feet, instead of catching a deadly illness in a hospital. We love that we can be annoyed with your screams in the middle of the night for milk, instead of someone else getting up to tend to you while you are hooked to a ventilator machine. We are so thankful that we can enjoy all of these things. Today. Life is so good to you right now, and we are forever grateful for that. So much hope for your future, our sweet Eli. We hope and pray for many, many more birthdays with you, celebrating the miracle that you are.

Everyday, we rejoice in you. God has given us such a gift. You have taught us so much about life. We love you so much and you are our brave little heart warrior.

Happy 1st Birthday, our little miracle. We love you.
Mommy, Daddy and Lucas.

We also want to say that we cannot forget our donor heart family. They are the very reason we have Eli today. The unselfish act they chose on Nov 8 2013. Please pray for that family as they are also still healing from this journey. A journey for them, that will take much longer to heal.

Dear Donor,
That name seems so cold considering the role you now have in our life. You will save our sons life. We've thought about you a thousand times in the last week. We've wondered how your family will cope without you. We know they will miss your smile, your voice, your presence. And yet a part of you will be here, forever united, to our family. Your heart. His body. Working together to give him life. The gratitude, love, sorrow, guilt, and joy in our heart is all we are able to cope with, for now. We want to remember that it is you and your amazing family that gave our son a chance at life. We want to let you know how grateful we are for this gift. We want you to know that every day you are thought of and loved and remembered by our family. Your gift to us will never be forgotten or treated lightly. While your moments of this life were cut short, we want you to live them all within our sweet Eli. Thank you will never be enough. It will never say what we feel in our hearts. It will never suffice for how we feel towards you and your family. We hope to take you with us on Eli's journey from here on out.
Thank you for giving our son this life. Thank you for your perfect heart. Our son who was once half, will now be whole.
<3