Time is flying by.

I am 25 weeks on Thursday and starting to feel even more overwhelmed than I was with Lucas at this stage. Yes, it's due to the severity of Eli's diagnosis but my panic button is almost ready to be hit. It's overwheling. I read on an HLHS blog that you just hit a point where you stop counting how far along you are and you start counting down how little time is left. I couldnt have said it better myself.

I began to think abou packing the hospital bag. Now that we have an induction date, my timeline is somewhat shorter. While packing the bag for Lucas was so much easier, this time its not that easy. What in the hell am I even going to take this time. Besides the essentials for me, Eli wont need any personal items because of his stay in the nicu after birth. They told us ATLEAST 6 weeks before he could come home! Thats over an entire month folks. AN ENTIRE MONTH! By that time, who even knows how big he will be or able to fit into for a "coming home outfit"!

I have no idea what life looks for us afterwards. Its not like we dont live close enough to Childrens that we couldnt go home and get stuff but I also dont know that Danny or I will even want to leave him. AND how does Lucas play into all of this...I dont want him to feel any less loved or given any less attention too. Ugh, it just makes me so sad. I cant even fathom that right now.

I just feel so out of control. Overwhelmed, and nervous. I just dont know what to expect. I wish I could get my brain to just focus but its just not wanting to do that.

What I really need is a tall bud light...how wonderful would that be :)

Next up: Fetal Echocardiogram on April 15th. Growth ultrasound on April 17th.